Before you date someone

Today dating has become a normal household name in our world; we have so commonised it that it’s gradually losing its relevance. Dating has been described as a form of regular romantic courtship between two individuals or the meeting with a lover or a potential lover. Dating experience can be a healthy and wholesome experience if God is made the focal point right from the outset or it could be nightmarish, the experience you desire is entirely your decision.

Today, I will be highlighting some advice for making the dating experience something you and God can feel good about afterwards.
 
You have to be spiritually prepared
as it is often implied that the physical is controlled by the spiritual…meaning before anything manifests in the physical (positively or negatively), it would’ve been settled spiritually first. For instance before you get the dream job you’ve always longed after, you must have been victorious in the place of prayer, it is this victory in the place of prayer that heralds the “calling for the interview and subsequent delivery of appointment letter to you” got it? So before you decide to go on a date with a friend or someone you claim to love, kindly talk to God about it. Time spent in the mirror is important but time spent with God is all-important. Let God know your intentions (eventhough He already knows), tell him to grant you utterances so that you won’t act amiss (Psalm 81:10).
Don’t think dating is an avenue to bore the other party with stories of how you struggled or the pity-party you throw for yourself because an ‘Ex’ left you, this is why you need God’s wisdom to filter and regulate the kinds of words that comes out of your mouth.

Feel free to talk about sex
Majority of us over-spiritualize issues forgetting that we are flesh with blood running through our veins, we tend to think “I am too spiritually matured to fall for sex”. But brother and sister, may I shock you by telling you that even the most spiritual of men have not been spared from this menace called sex, so why would your’s be different. So feel free to talk openly about sex before it becomes an issue. Physical intimacy is good in the confines of marriage but it burns one’s bosom outside it. So think protectively and proactively. Genuine love doesn’t say ‘if you loved me you would…’ this is called hypocritical love, rather it says ‘I love you too much to take advantage of you or cause you pain or ask you to do what you will feel bad about tomorrow’
Remember, he that thinks he stands should take heed lest he falls (1 Corinthians 10:12). Do not over spiritualize sex, tackle it headlong before it destroys you.

Limit your private time
When your friends start saying they never see you anymore, chances are that you’re becoming too exclusive with your partner, in this case you’re setting yourself up for a fall. Do not date as a couple, spend time in the company of others too. Limit the time you are alone, it could easily lead to stories that touch. Don’t always meet up to pray and blow tongues exclusively, the fire in tongue might later on evolve into the consuming fire of sex. When you’re both exclusive, you increase the chances of getting intimate by at least 40% and when emotion kicks in you might not be strong enough to resist it because you’ve already whetted your lust (James 1:14-15) and when lust is conceived, it brings forth sin and sin eventually births death. Death may not necessarily have to be physical alone, it could mean death of spiritual blessings, death of one’s health and finances, joy, happiness etc. I pray we will not die spiritually in Jesus’ name.

Get it right this time
This goes to those who have been permissive in past relationship(s). If you’ve allowed sin in your past relationship(s), don’t beat yourself up for that, don’t be discouraged, confess your sins to Him genuinely because He is faithful and just to forgive our sins (1 John 1:9) that means you can start all over again with a clean state, you can purport in your heart to do it the right way this time. Remember the strongest relationship always put God at the core, they demonstrate the kind of love described by Paul in (1 Corinthgians 13). You should take a look at the chapter one of these days, have a blessed week.